You Can't Make This Up Archives - Page 18 of 34

Taj Still Lives! And He’s Running for Arizona Attorney General

I just learned from a post on Above the Law that Tajudeen “Taj” Oladiran, a current candidate for Arizona Attorney General, has the dubious distinction of filing a motion in federal district court last year that was one of Above the Law’s five best motions of 2009. Above the Law says this about the five motions “We’re not in the business of filing pleadings at Above the Law, but there were five motions in 2009 that were outrageous enough to justify posting here.” The five motions are:

Motion to Compel State’s Attorney to Drop His Accent
A Surprisingly Smutty Motion to Dismiss
Motion to Compel Defense Counsel to Wear Appropriate Shoes at Trial
Plaintiffs’ Motion for a
[sic] Honest and Honorable Court System
Best Motion to Continue. Ever

Above the Law also said, “we were surprised that he would file one of the craziest motions we’ve come across here at Above The Law.” After reading the candidate for Arizona Attorney General’s motion in the case of Oladiran vs. Suntrust Mortgage, Inc., I agree. Taj needs another year of motion writing in law school. Here are some gems from his motion:

The motion is titled “Motion for a [sic] Honest and Honorable Court System”
He said the case was assigned to the “Dishonorable Susan R. Bolton”
It was filed “pursuant to the law of, what goes around comes around” I must have been absent from my law school class the day the professor discussed this law because I’ve never heard of it.
“I am very disappointed in the fact that a brainless coward like you is a federal judge.”
“I apologize to all my clients. I know, I’m sorry does not repair the mess”
“To my family, words can’t express my apologies; please remember me kindly.”
“Finally, to Susan Bolton, we shall meet again you know where :-).”

Above the Law sought feedback from Taj and Taj responded. See Above the Law’s “Taj Lives! (And He’s Pissed), which contains a lengthy diatribe by Taj, including background from his perspective on the Oladiran vs. Suntrust Mortgage lawsuit. Taj’s background makes for interesting reading. For example, he says that after Suntrust loaned him $760,000 to buy a second home and his monthly loan payments went from $2,000+ to $9,000+, he “began researching the law governing the facts of my case. Surprisingly, what I discovered is that while my actions were financially dumb . . . .” A lot of non-lawyers could have reached that conclusion without researching the law.

Hell Hath No Fury Like a Wife Whose Husband Won’t Share Their Tax Refund

5ksdk.com reports about a woman charge with attempted murder. She allegedly tried to kill her husband after he refused to give her part of their income tax refund.

Court Does Not Buy Mechanic’s Excuse the Rat Ate My Customer’s Car Parts

An auto mechanic was sentenced to six years in prison for defrauding customers. He routinely put a dead rat in a customer’s car and charged to repair the alleged rodent damage. The entrepreneurial dude charged 25 insurance companies over four years for 236 jobs he never performed. The guy’s wife pleaded guilty to 10 tax evasion felony counts. They couple now must pay the insurance companies $875,000.

School District Gives Up Trying to Fire 79 Year Old 4th Grade Teacher After 5 Years

From the government workers are hired for life department. The LA Weekly story called “LAUSD’s Dance of the Lemons” explains how difficult to impossible it is for the Los Angeles Unified School District to fire a teacher. The LAUSD attempted to fire 74 year old 4th grade teacher Shirley Loftis, but gave up after five years. The the state Commission on Professional Competence found that the district had grounds to fire her, but did not allow her to be fired. During this five year period the district paid Ms. Loftis $300,000 to perform an admin job plus $190,000 for her legal fees.

Why do we have governmental agencies, including schools, that do not hire and fire based on competence or the lack thereof? Why isn’t educating the children more important than the job of one teacher? Is the purpose of a school to educate the children or to provide employment for life for teachers? The article says

“It is so difficult to dismiss or discipline veteran teachers. . . . Recent articles in the Los Angeles Times have described teachers who draw full pay for years while they sit at home fighting allegations of sexual or physical misconduct. But the far larger problem in L.A. is one of “performance cases” — the teachers who cannot teach, yet cannot be fired. Their ranks are believed to be sizable — perhaps 1,000 teachers, responsible for 30,000 children. . . .

But the Weekly has found, in a five-month investigation, that principals and school district leaders have all but given up dismissing such teachers. In the past decade, LAUSD officials spent $3.5 million trying to fire just seven of the district’s 33,000 teachers for poor classroom performance — and only four were fired, during legal struggles that wore on, on average, for five years each. Two of the three others were paid large settlements, and one was reinstated. The average cost of each battle is $500,000.

New York City Must Pay Cop $4.5 Million After He Accidentally Shot Himself

This story in not recent news, but I just heard about it because the City of New York is appealing the verdict that it must pay a cop $4.5 million after he shot himself when the chair he was sitting on collapsed. The New York Injury Cases Blog has a good summary of this amazing case. The “victim” idiot was sitting in the now notorious chair when a fellow cop asked the idiot to hold his gun. Instead of putting the gun on a desk or in a desk drawer or in a holster that protects against accidental discharge of the weapon, poop-for-brains put the loaded weapon in his waistband, leaned back on the chair, it fell over, dude grabbed for the gun (why?), put his finger on the trigger and pulled. Result: 9mm slug in idiot’s knee and the city owes him $4.5 million.

The case is more evidence of the damage that run-a-way litigation and jury verdicts do to our country. Why did the city have to pay a cent? Why did the guy grab for the gun as he was falling? Think about it. If you are sitting in a chair, you lean back and the chair falls over backward with you in it, do you grab for the gun in your waistband or do you put your hands out to break your fall? I would try to break my fall and so would 99.999% of everybody on the planet. Frankly, I have a hard time believing his story.

Everybody who has had any training in gun safety knows:

You never put a loaded weapon in your waistband.
You always carry a loaded weapon in a holster.
You never put your finger on the trigger unless you are preparing to fire or intend to fire.

I am sure that New York cops are trained in these fundamental concepts of weapons safety. The guy broke three fundamental safety rules and it’s the City’s fault he shot himself! Why does the City of New York have to pay for the idiot cop’s stupidity? Why is it that people are not responsible for their actions? Why do people want to blame others for their mistakes?

See the story in the New York Daily News called “Ex-city cop wins huge award after chair he sat in broke, sending bullet into his knee.”